Archive for the 'Introductions' Category

The Runaway

First off, I’m a wretched blogger for being so absent! Things have been crazy busy. But that is neither here nor there…
But now, a story.
My vision has been hazy all morning and I don’t know what’s up with it. I had Lasik a few years ago and things have been totally fine since. I really hope my bionic vision won’t stay on the fritz for long.

Anyway, the big excitement of the morning was a runaway Ford Focus hatchback! OMG! I was parking my car and I noticed the little red hatchback pull up next to me. As I was gathering my things I noticed a blur of red out of the corner of my eye. I thought the guy driving it must be straightening out the car or something. Then I noticed the car was awfully quiet. Then I thought my eyes were just playing tricks on me…because I couldn’t see the driver. Then I realized that the driver of the car was walking away and the car was quite close to hitting him. So then I yelled, “Dude! Your car!” He turned around and then I noticed he was walking with a cane. And I was like OH SHIT! The guy threw his cane down and tried to stop the runaway car, but he’s no Superman, he’s closer to House. So that was totally ineffective. Luckily the car ran into a curb and stopped on its own…narrowly avoiding my car and the dozens of others and the lady who was standing nearby. The guy said he didn’t know how to drive a manual and he’d borrowed the car from a friend. He hopped back in and reparked it. I really hope he set the parking break this time…

Coincidentally, my old Infiniti was struck in an accident very similar to this several years ago. My sorority sister’s Mustang rolled out of her driveway, pushed her roommate’s Jeep, and the two barreled into my poor little car down the street.

Crazy.

And, I still feel a little bit blind. I should probably avoid the computer for the day. But I think that’s impossible.

I Am a Cheeseburger

The Legend of Etilia, the Bloody Vampirate

Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted to grow up and be a pirate.  She wanted a parrot and a rad ship so she could sail around the world.  Like most children, however, she was indecissive.  She also liked to pretend she was a vampire.  Her family humored her and allowed her to nap in her toy chest that she considered her coffin.  The older she grew the clearer it became that she didn’t have to choose between the two.  Being a pirate is really a profession, but being a vampire is a lifestyle.  (Technically it’s an unlifestyle, but nevermind.)

Anyhow, Etilia, the Bloody Vampirate, is my resident graphics fiend and is responsible for giving my Buffy and Angel DVDs a good workout after collecting some dust since their last use.  When she’s not busy bouncing around her flat and being creative, she’s entertaining her cats.  One of them thinks she’s a parrot!  Cats can apparently sense what their owners want to be when they grow up!

Once again, thanks to my vampirate  for making my diary all shiny again!