After a (shocking) formal job offer made this very afternoon, Girl Friday will take the leap from tenuous employment to The Work Force much sooner than expected. She’ll be joining the Team at the property management office in a “critical” role—according to her HR contact, Mendel.
Mendel’s chipper attitude made the good and the bad news easier to swallow (the good: midrange starting salary; the bad: $450 yearly parking cost). Before reporting to her first day on the job, Girl Friday will sit through four hours of new employee orientation. In the time it would normally take her to catch up on Tivo, Girl Friday will learn workplace jargon like PPO, 403B, and Title IX.
Considering the happy news, Girl Friday is surprisingly stoic. Her excitement barometer has yet to rise—she’s waiting for her probation period to end before she celebrates (party in June!). She isn’t sure if she’ll have access to E!Online, IMDB, or decent coffee. One thing is for sure, Girl Friday’s reign as Superheroine of Small Offices Everywhere is over. Her new division alone is comprised of five hundred cohorts.
While the jury is still out on the announcement, Girl Friday will be trying on new titles for size. How does Superheroine of Reluctant Admin Assistants Everywhere sound?
A bit too perfect…
Hey all! Notice how my last story was a two-parter? Read Part I first, then Part II last!
Apparently Girl Friday’s cheap tricks were enough! Days later she was contacted and asked back for a second interview. The holidays prolonged her anticipation, although the looming interview did serve as a good sound byte for her nosy relatives that asked her what she was doing by way of employment.
Girl Friday put on the requisite office gal outfit this morning, one that screams competence and wholesome values. She arrived on time and was escorted to an executive office where two professional women waited. She sat at the oblong table and saw a plastic cupful of water (news of her dry mouth syndrome had obviously spread). Girl Friday answered every question thoughtfully, treading lightly on her large vocabulary, thereby avoiding a session of tongue-tied embarrassment. Before she knew it, she was mired in quicksand. “Have you ever been involved in an office conflict?” Who hasn’t, and furthermore, who enjoys reliving it? Girl Friday’s heart beat like a bass drum. She jumped into the sticky topic hoping to remain suave and unscathed. She groped for words, her voice wavered, and she floundered. It was not Girl Friday’s finest moment. Equipped with saving face, Girl Friday recovered and tried to show them how personality is more endearing than perfection.
Thirty minutes passed by and Girl Friday stood up to go, confident that she’d done her best. No doubt this office needs a stellar administrative vixen, but is it ready for Girl Friday?